A Series of Unfortunate Events: Cabo Edition

Gather round boys and girls, and men and women you should join in as well. Today Kaitlin Mary has a story to tell. And with all the Christmas cheer in the air, the tone of this story is going to seem familiar. Yes, I’ll be attempting to talk in rhyme, like one of those classic stories in time. But who knows maybe it will trickle out once in a while, not everyone can be like Dr. Seuss. But either way, buckle up ladies and gentlemen, this story is about to begin.


Once upon a time, in a kingdom far away, the sun was starting to shine. Our young heroine, Kaitlin Mary was ready for an adventure. Her annual trip to Cabo San Lucas was all she could think about. She was ready to rest and relax. But little did she know her plans would go to the trash.


On a bright early morning, Kaitlin Mary was frantically packing. Of course she waited until the last minute, like the procrastinator she tends to be occasionally. She took a look at the list she made, checking off items one by one. Clothing, check. Toiletries, check. Makeup, check. Everything seemed to be in place, so she zipped up her suitcase. She ran down the stairs, to see how her family was doing. Mom and Dad were ready to go, but for her brother and his girlfriend that was not the case.


They all had 15 minutes or so before the shuttle would arrive, everyone was bringing down their suitcases and putting them in line. Soon enough the shuttle arrived, and off to LAX they went. Traffic was light, until a fire on the side of the road started to ignite. ’Twas nothing serious just a little brush fire, nothing quite so dire. But everyone on the freeway had to stop and stare then move along once they saw what was there.


Once the family arrived to the infamous LAX, the usual airport routine commenced. The gang and their bags were all checked in, and they went through security in a flash. Looking for their gate was a tedious task, it turned out they had to take a bus and cross the tarmac just to get there. But once they got to their gate, good news came like a chance of fate. Their flight only had sixteen passengers on board, the family scored. Each person had their own row to themselves, how lucky was that? Little did Kaitlin Mary know, this was the moment where her luck ran out.


Once they landed, everything was a breeze. No lines for immigration or customs, and their bags were all ready at the carousel waiting for them. This day was just too good to be true, our little optimist thought. So off to the hotel they went, the ride was bumpy in the night. But they all got to Fiesta Americana in one piece luckily. They were all checked in, and it was off to the room via golf cart. Here we encounter our first unfortunate event. Waiting for the elevator, took some time. Why? Turns out there was no power attached to those lines. Thanks to the hurricanes, it was the stairs for us all.


But something small like the elevators not working wouldn’t put a damper on this holiday. So a good night’s rest was what the family needed. Off to bed they went, some tried to find something on the TV. Low and behold, most of the English speaking channels were not functioning properly. Another side effect from the hurricane one could assume. Luckily, Kaitlin Mary had her Netflix. Even though she couldn’t watch her latest obsession, Riverdale, due to the fact the content wasn’t available in Mexico, she worked with what she was dealt and off to dreamland she went.

The next day, Kaitlin Mary woke up all feeling relaxed and refreshed. She ate a big breakfast and got ready for the day. Today her focus was on laying by the pool and working on her tan. But the theme of this story is that nothing goes according to plan.


Down to the pool she went with her spirits high and bright, she ordered a margarita to sip on in the sunlight. After one drink, Kaitlin Mary felt woozy and decided to switch to something lighter. A Tecate it is, because let’s face it, beer is just water in Mexico. Two drinks later, something was not quite right. I’ll spare you all the details, it wasn’t a pretty sight. Let’s just say, Kaitlin Mary’s day turned to night.


When she awoke from her impromptu nap, her head was pounding. She looked at her surroundings and chugged some water. In order to feel better, Kaitlin Mary thought a relaxing bubble bath would do the trick. After that she attempted to put herself together and went to see how the rest of her family was doing. They were in much better condition, and getting ready to order some dinner. And just like that, Kaitlin Mary’s stomach growled. Dinner was a great idea. She put her order in, and decided to go take a walk outside, some fresh air would do the trick. When she went to look for her shoes, she noticed they were missing.


She asked around to all of her family, no one had any idea where her shoes went. Her first thought was who let her leave the pool area without her shoes?! So now Kaitlin Mary’s leisurely stroll turned into a search for missing sandals. Down the stairs, barefoot, she went to the place where she last had them. Ah yes the scene of the crime: the pool.


To her surprise, there they were. Her sandals were sitting right where she left them. She put them on and proceeded with her leisurely stroll. The fresh air did her some good, but Kaitlin Mary still wasn’t feeling like her best self. So she stopped by the gift shop to pick up a Sprite for her achy stomach. She walked into the store, grabbed a Sprite and was on her way out. But then the cashier called out to her to say something along the lines of have a nice night or feel better, to be honest it’s all a fog.


Let’s move along to the next day, it was a new day for our young heroine. She sought to make it the best day since she missed out on the day before. Plus it was her last day of vacation. She started the day once again with breakfast, this time at the amazing buffet and spending some quality time with her dad. Once they returned to the room to get ready for the day’s adventure, Kaitlin Mary’s mother had a story to tell.


It turns out, while the maid was cleaning our rooms she was taking cash from our belongings. Her mom explained how she was missing over $200 from her wallet while the maid was taking an extra long time to clean. When she went to check her wallet while the maid was in the room, the maid mysteriously found $200 behind the TV. Sketchy, right? This paranoia spread to Kaitlin Mary, so she rushed and hurried to check her belongings. She hadn’t spent any cash in Mexico yet, so she knew she had $80 in her backpack. When she went to check her belongings she saw she only had $40 remaining.


“SON OF A BITCH!” Kaitlin Mary yelled. This could not be happening. Out of all the times she’s been to Cabo, nothing like this has ever occurred before. Each day only got worse and worse, good thing they were leaving tomorrow.


After the morning’s events, the family still went to town. Kaitlin Mary slipped her Tecate while wearing a frown. She looked off into the abyss and thought to herself, how on Earth did her trip end like this? But to get peace of mind, later that night she went down to the beach to unwind. She wrote in her journal of the events that unfolded and watched the wild little sea crabs come out of their holes. And in that moment, Kaitlin Mary found some bliss.


The next day, Kaitlin Mary was ecstatic to get out of this place, this trip to Cabo San Lucas was practically a waste. She was packed up and ready to leave, but one good thing came of this trip. Kaitlin Mary was leaving Mexico a little less naive.


What’s important to takeaway are those important life lessons. If you ever find yourself in Mexico, take things nice and slow. Otherwise your days will be a blur. Also be wary of your surroundings, even in the resorts. Lock up your belongings in safes or hide them away, otherwise things will go missing and you’ll have to file a report. Learn from Kaitlin Mary’s mistakes so when you leave Mexico you leave without a giant headache.


I hope you enjoyed this story based on true life events, but what would be nice is to hear your two cents. Comment below if you have encountered anything like this, or if you want to offer any tips.
Until tomorrow.

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